Thursday, December 30, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
Happy 100th post, you guys.
Sometimes I forget where I am and where I'm going, and there's just a lurching in my stomach to remind me of the fact that this is /not/ the end, this is /not/ where I'm destined to be my entire life. It always meant so much to me to be able to look forward to something at the end of the day, to have a plan of the rest of my life. For a while, when I was younger I looked down on those who confessed to have a lack of life plan. I thought they were inferior. Better to have a half-thought out plan, to latch onto any idea for the future, than to admit defeat and let the world go on.
Then one day I realized that no one really knows for sure where he or she is going. I guess we're all so affected by so many factors, making dead-set plans doesn't necessarily guarantee success. Doesn't mean we shouldn't try, steer our lives in certain directions, but... I think I learned to let go a little bit.
Maybe that realization came a little later in life than I intended. Maybe it's a little relieving to be able to release the control I always thought was so sought after. And maybe I'm learning to do that in more ways than just one, now.
My thoughts are drifting. That's just... in my head right now. Not the normal beginning-middle-end my entries normally tend toward.
Sara
Then one day I realized that no one really knows for sure where he or she is going. I guess we're all so affected by so many factors, making dead-set plans doesn't necessarily guarantee success. Doesn't mean we shouldn't try, steer our lives in certain directions, but... I think I learned to let go a little bit.
Maybe that realization came a little later in life than I intended. Maybe it's a little relieving to be able to release the control I always thought was so sought after. And maybe I'm learning to do that in more ways than just one, now.
My thoughts are drifting. That's just... in my head right now. Not the normal beginning-middle-end my entries normally tend toward.
Sara
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Once Upon A Time I Decided To Make A Coloring Book
Thursday, December 23, 2010
How to Spread Holiday Cheer
Having trouble formulating the proper response to your musty aunt's disturbingly moth-eaten gift? Trying hard to remain placid in the face of terrors involving reciprocation of love and warmth? Try this!
(Insert cheesy card here) Dear ______,
Thank you for the ______. It is so remarkable/interesting/original/surprising (circle one)! Happy Holidays.
Love/from/sincerely (circle one), ______.
Have fun during this holiday season and try hard not to be crushed in the writhing masses that swarm those shrines to consumerism called "malls".
Lots of love,
Sara
(Insert cheesy card here) Dear ______,
Thank you for the ______. It is so remarkable/interesting/original/surprising (circle one)! Happy Holidays.
Love/from/sincerely (circle one), ______.
Have fun during this holiday season and try hard not to be crushed in the writhing masses that swarm those shrines to consumerism called "malls".
Lots of love,
Sara
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Saturday, December 18, 2010
More Words
“Untitled”
Sara Balabanlilar
Just. Take. A. Bite.
She says, leaning over you.
Apple in small, calloused hand.
You don’t know how to react, and words,
Normally lush and multitudinous in your everyday life,
Remain tumbling in your sensitized brain.
Your heart beats faster and she pushes toward you.
Her pink lips mouth the words, twitching with the beginnings of a mischievous grin.
Come on. She nears the apple to your lips.
The aroma finds its way to you and insinuates itself into your nostrils,
The heady scent taking over.
Breathe. Breath. Mouth. Open.
It happens before you realize it.
Your lips aren’t used to what this fruit has to offer,
But there is so much time to learn.
And you find, draped in her warmth and the spicy sweet odor,
That you could so easily lose yourself in it
Time and time again.
I submitted this to Steward House's weekly contest this past week, and it got second place. Yay! :)
And now... now it's time for winter break. Lots of words in the coming days, I hope.
Sara
Sara Balabanlilar
Just. Take. A. Bite.
She says, leaning over you.
Apple in small, calloused hand.
You don’t know how to react, and words,
Normally lush and multitudinous in your everyday life,
Remain tumbling in your sensitized brain.
Your heart beats faster and she pushes toward you.
Her pink lips mouth the words, twitching with the beginnings of a mischievous grin.
Come on. She nears the apple to your lips.
The aroma finds its way to you and insinuates itself into your nostrils,
The heady scent taking over.
Breathe. Breath. Mouth. Open.
It happens before you realize it.
Your lips aren’t used to what this fruit has to offer,
But there is so much time to learn.
And you find, draped in her warmth and the spicy sweet odor,
That you could so easily lose yourself in it
Time and time again.
I submitted this to Steward House's weekly contest this past week, and it got second place. Yay! :)
And now... now it's time for winter break. Lots of words in the coming days, I hope.
Sara
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Picture of the Day
Some days are like the ocean. We sit. We cry salty tears that slip into the crevices of our mouths and make us remember the sound of the waves crashing against the shore. We rock back and forth and it’s not because we’ve gone crazy, it’s because we’re in a rowboat out to sea. We sing old sailor songs and eat grapefruit candy because you once heard that citrus prevents scurvy and I couldn’t find any limes. We slip together and become one with the water, the night sky above singing us to sleep with its plethora of stars.
I had a dream that all my thoughts and fears and hot wheels were mashed haphazardly into quesadillas. I tried showing you them all. But it was hard to detangle the metal from the melted cheese.
Sara
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Taboo or realistic? Sex Ed in America
The accepted age for sex gets younger and younger as we are bombarded with a constant sexuality in the media. Now, it’s not sexuality in general that I mind – I definitely believe in being open about that kind of subject. However, it’s the paradoxical portrayal of sexuality, particularly teen sexuality, as something both taboo and commonplace, that bothers me most.
Every day in magazines, TV shows and movies we are shown examples of the hyper-sexualized beings we could be. Pop figures like Miley Cyrus and Paris Hilton flash before our eyes in all of their exposed sexuality and promiscuity and we’re constantly reminded that these are our peers, these are our role models. This “ideal teen” is only made more alluring and mysterious by the other voice in our society – the mantra to wait until marriage, to not have sex as a teenager, to realize we’re not ready, to think of the consequences. How are we supposed to stand when these conflicting teen personas are both labeled as the norm?
It’s definitely truth that kids are often having sex far too young, before they’re ready to deal with the possible consequences. 13 years of age does not make someone an adult, and to assume that it does is a big mistake. This does NOT mean, however, that we as a society can put off dealing with proper sexual education until the age at which we believe young men and women are “ready.” No matter what the law, people will always be breaking it. No matter when parents tell their kids they shouldn’t be having sex, those same kids will be.
So what’s the deal with shoving proper information and representations of sexuality under the table in attempts to create moral men and women?
Sex ed needs to start early, and be comprehensive. The fact that we’re educating 12-year-olds about sex does not mean we’re condoning the activity among that age group, it means we’re admitting to the fact that sexuality is out there in our society, and needs to be addressed. We’re admitting to the fact that one day these kids will be having sex, and when they do, they need to be able to make informed decisions about it. As with any other topic, last-minute education is almost as bad as no education at all.
Beyond just warning kids to be careful of STDs and wear condoms, something the schools can’t even provide, we need to break out of the hetero-normative health education tradition we have. In my health class sophomore year, I was told to be safe and protect myself against any possible consequences by waiting until marriage to have sex.
Hold on.
Sorry to break it to everyone here, but I can only legally get married in five states, my own not being one of them. Of course unwanted pregnancy isn’t an issue in my case, but there’s still the very large risk of STDs and damage to emotional and mental health. In my efforts to inform myself about the most basic precautions regarding my sexuality as I entered young adulthood, I was driven to the internet as my only source of information. And thank goodness for sources like gURL.com, providing unbiased and propaganda-less information about all health risks, no matter the sexes involved. But there was a lot of trash to weed through as well, and I can assure you that not all teens would take the time (hours, in fact) on search engines to make sure they were being safe. Parents, obviously, can’t be relied on to provide the proper information.
That’s where the public education is supposed to step in, and isn’t. In efforts to eradicate the idea that they’d be, by educating us about it, supporting homosexuality and pre-marital sex (both grave sins indeed, I’m sure), they ignore the details altogether. Instead, they’re taking the blithe and easy way out by assuring us all happily that we’ll avoid most issues by waiting until we’re married and have a house, car, and health insurance to have sex – while on that same resource from which I gained information about my own health, the beloved internet, pictures circulate of the latest sex tape or teen love affair.
Please, America, can we have some balance?
Sara
Every day in magazines, TV shows and movies we are shown examples of the hyper-sexualized beings we could be. Pop figures like Miley Cyrus and Paris Hilton flash before our eyes in all of their exposed sexuality and promiscuity and we’re constantly reminded that these are our peers, these are our role models. This “ideal teen” is only made more alluring and mysterious by the other voice in our society – the mantra to wait until marriage, to not have sex as a teenager, to realize we’re not ready, to think of the consequences. How are we supposed to stand when these conflicting teen personas are both labeled as the norm?
It’s definitely truth that kids are often having sex far too young, before they’re ready to deal with the possible consequences. 13 years of age does not make someone an adult, and to assume that it does is a big mistake. This does NOT mean, however, that we as a society can put off dealing with proper sexual education until the age at which we believe young men and women are “ready.” No matter what the law, people will always be breaking it. No matter when parents tell their kids they shouldn’t be having sex, those same kids will be.
So what’s the deal with shoving proper information and representations of sexuality under the table in attempts to create moral men and women?
Sex ed needs to start early, and be comprehensive. The fact that we’re educating 12-year-olds about sex does not mean we’re condoning the activity among that age group, it means we’re admitting to the fact that sexuality is out there in our society, and needs to be addressed. We’re admitting to the fact that one day these kids will be having sex, and when they do, they need to be able to make informed decisions about it. As with any other topic, last-minute education is almost as bad as no education at all.
Beyond just warning kids to be careful of STDs and wear condoms, something the schools can’t even provide, we need to break out of the hetero-normative health education tradition we have. In my health class sophomore year, I was told to be safe and protect myself against any possible consequences by waiting until marriage to have sex.
Hold on.
Sorry to break it to everyone here, but I can only legally get married in five states, my own not being one of them. Of course unwanted pregnancy isn’t an issue in my case, but there’s still the very large risk of STDs and damage to emotional and mental health. In my efforts to inform myself about the most basic precautions regarding my sexuality as I entered young adulthood, I was driven to the internet as my only source of information. And thank goodness for sources like gURL.com, providing unbiased and propaganda-less information about all health risks, no matter the sexes involved. But there was a lot of trash to weed through as well, and I can assure you that not all teens would take the time (hours, in fact) on search engines to make sure they were being safe. Parents, obviously, can’t be relied on to provide the proper information.
That’s where the public education is supposed to step in, and isn’t. In efforts to eradicate the idea that they’d be, by educating us about it, supporting homosexuality and pre-marital sex (both grave sins indeed, I’m sure), they ignore the details altogether. Instead, they’re taking the blithe and easy way out by assuring us all happily that we’ll avoid most issues by waiting until we’re married and have a house, car, and health insurance to have sex – while on that same resource from which I gained information about my own health, the beloved internet, pictures circulate of the latest sex tape or teen love affair.
Please, America, can we have some balance?
Sara
Monday, November 29, 2010
Head.
It's hard to get back into Houston and be excited about doing so when the body's first reaction is a blinding migraine. Everything is echoing.
Sara
Sara
Thanksgiving Break
A break from school. A break from my city. A break from home and work and mindless mindless tasks. This Thanksgiving has been the best I've ever had. It's been a bit of a tough semester, and being able to slip out of contact and out of the eyes of most for five whole days was something I'm not used to.
I arrived in Columbus in the late evening on the 23rd and immediately reconnected with my girlfriend (whom I hadn't seen in close to four months) and then my father (whom I hadn't seen in exactly five months). Columbus, I could tell almost immediately, has blossomed since I've lived there, and it was great to see the changes.
The Short North, always my favourite district and a center for eclectic events and people, has grown by several blocks to include more cafes, galleries, novelty stores, and restaurants. Though the temperature dropped to 28 degrees Fahrenheit, there were many opportunities to remain warm as my friends and I walked from shop to shop, examining various interiors and exclaiming over items not seen elsewhere.
Due to a lack of wifi, I couldn't stay right on top of everyone and everything in Houston even if I wanted to. Being somewhat of an escapist, I'll admit, this was a shocking and beautiful turn of events. Evenings were filled with reading, chatting and drinking tea, and then later in the break with driving around, drinking coffee at an amazing cafe on OSU campus, and exploring a city I once called home. My phone was the only source of internet (a concept that still amazes me), and even that was iffy. Therefore, I was once again outside my box a bit as I navigated a somewhat technology-less week.
I also spent time with old family friends during thanksgiving day; a large group of hilarious, sometimes-philosophical, cynical, loud, interesting, sometimes-Communist Turkish people. Food was piled on plates over and over again, and I heard many-an interesting story from an Iranian former spy. Being with a large group of (mostly) Turks is unlike anything else.
All in all, it was an amazing break. I'm returning to school much more relaxed and ready to get everything done. Photos will be here soon.
Sara
I arrived in Columbus in the late evening on the 23rd and immediately reconnected with my girlfriend (whom I hadn't seen in close to four months) and then my father (whom I hadn't seen in exactly five months). Columbus, I could tell almost immediately, has blossomed since I've lived there, and it was great to see the changes.
The Short North, always my favourite district and a center for eclectic events and people, has grown by several blocks to include more cafes, galleries, novelty stores, and restaurants. Though the temperature dropped to 28 degrees Fahrenheit, there were many opportunities to remain warm as my friends and I walked from shop to shop, examining various interiors and exclaiming over items not seen elsewhere.
Due to a lack of wifi, I couldn't stay right on top of everyone and everything in Houston even if I wanted to. Being somewhat of an escapist, I'll admit, this was a shocking and beautiful turn of events. Evenings were filled with reading, chatting and drinking tea, and then later in the break with driving around, drinking coffee at an amazing cafe on OSU campus, and exploring a city I once called home. My phone was the only source of internet (a concept that still amazes me), and even that was iffy. Therefore, I was once again outside my box a bit as I navigated a somewhat technology-less week.
I also spent time with old family friends during thanksgiving day; a large group of hilarious, sometimes-philosophical, cynical, loud, interesting, sometimes-Communist Turkish people. Food was piled on plates over and over again, and I heard many-an interesting story from an Iranian former spy. Being with a large group of (mostly) Turks is unlike anything else.
All in all, it was an amazing break. I'm returning to school much more relaxed and ready to get everything done. Photos will be here soon.
Sara
Monday, November 22, 2010
Picture of the Day
I went to Brasil Cafe for a while a last night. At around 8 pm, a jazz band started setting up! It was a good reminder that the city doesn't die when the sun goes down.
Sara
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
Picture of The Day
I woke up early this morning to take my dog for a walk. The sky was bright blue, the sun was shining and mist surrounded everything to make the campus glow. It was beautiful.
Sara
Sara
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Music of The Day
I don't have a picture today. Here's some music instead.
There's my music contribution for the day. I hope you all enjoy it.
Sara
There's my music contribution for the day. I hope you all enjoy it.
Sara
Monday, November 15, 2010
Pictures of the Day - a day in Houston
Guys? I have a problem. I think I'm addicted to exploring new places around the city. Okay, okay, that sounds ridiculous. But keep in mind that I have no driver's license. My poor mother.
For breakfast? Dirk's coffee. Previously Diedrich's, this cozy neighborhood place offers a selection of pastries and (the best) bagels (in the whole world) from the Hot Bagel Shop. Though the huge windows look out onto a wide grey road, it's still cozy to sit at the counter peering out the window through steam from a hot coffee.
Half Price Books! Seriously, why did I not buy this book. We're reading passages from it in English class -- we just finished the Oresteia, and it's possibly the best thing I've ever read in an English class. The writing was so amazing, and put in historical context (though our English teacher certainly didn't make an effort at that...), it's even more interesting. Moral of the story: I love used bookstores.
Lunchtime! Yeah, I really spend that long in bookstores. Quite the nerd, I will admit. Taco-a-go-go on Main is a great place to cheaply (a good idea, after spending so much as I do at bookstores) satisfy your hunger with delicious tacos. Who would've guessed, with a restaurant name like that, hm? In addition, the place has every Mexican soda you could ever ask for, coffee, alcohol... and yeah, other foods too. But even the employees agree that you should stick to basics. Even if you're going to branch out by getting a dessert taco *gasp* in the flavors of pumpkin pie or blackberries and cream.
Then I came back closer in to my own neighborhood by visiting the MFAH (Museum of Fine Arts) and the CAMH (Contemporary Arts Museum). I saw a series of sixteen or seventeen short films called Independent Exposure, produced by Micro Film. It was in turn awesome, disturbing, hilarious, cute, strange, experimental, jarring, and just plain confusing. I'd highly recommend it if you ever get the chance to see it, though I don't know if it's playing outside the Cinema Arts Festival. Which, by the way, has now ended. NOOOOOO! I suppose this means I get to hold on to some of my money, though.
After that, home. Even if you don't live in the area, there's plenty more to do. You could go to Hermann park, ride the little train around, walk around the Japanese garden and go to the zoo. You could go to Rice University, eat at the student center, find a film at the Rice Cinema, and go to D-17, the installation at the Rice Gallery. You could... you get my point. You have no excuses for not having fun in this city. It can be so cool.
Sara
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Picture of The Day
Today, I went to the MFAH to see a series of short films in conjunction with the Cinema Arts Festival. The series was entitled Independent Exposure, produced by Micro Film. It was fantastic. I promise I'll have a review of it up in the future, when I have time! For now? Busy busy busy.
Sara
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Taft Street Coffee
Sara
My Article? Published? Yay!
My article's coming out tomorrow in the issue of 29-95! I'm really excited. I got a copy of it today from my mentor at the chronicle.
And congrats to Charlie Hardwick for having his art on the cover of the issue!
Sara
And congrats to Charlie Hardwick for having his art on the cover of the issue!
Sara
Monday, November 8, 2010
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Picture of the day (Three for the price of one?)
Today, I was walking in Rice Village on my quest to find my friend. Along the way, I found three new faces in Rice village. If you will recall, I found three previously. These new ones are a little different. I like 'em.
Sara
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Picture of The Day
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Picture of The Day
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Saturday, October 30, 2010
P.S; books.
Today, I bought four new books at Kaboom:
Yeah, I'm pretty excited about these.
Sara
- A River Sutra, by Gita Mehta. From the back of the book:
"Evokes the Indian landscape so sharply that we can practically smell the night-blooming jasmine... the sense that things are richer and more meaningful than they seem, that life is both clear and mysterious, that the beauty and the horror of this world is irreducible and inexplicable." -Washington Post Book World
- Flaming Iguanas: An Illustrated All-Girl Road Novel Thing, by Erika Lopez. An excerpt:
"Magdalena and I are gonna cross America on two motorcycles. We're gonna be so cool, mirrors and windows will break when we pass by. We'll have our own hardcore theme music that makes us throw our heads back and bite the sky. Bugs may stick to my burgundy lipstick, but I'll just spit them back and they'll look all the prettier for it."
- The Abortion: An Historical Romance 1966, by Richard Brautigan. From the cover:
"This novel is about the romantic possibilities of a public library in California."
- House of Leaves, by Mark Z. Danielewski. From the back of the book:
Its secrets are rich and obscure. Danielewski's textured novel is about apprehensions, in all senses of the word: to anticipate with dread, to seize, to understand." -Gregory Maguire
Yeah, I'm pretty excited about these.
Sara
The Third Ward
Last Wednesday, I was assigned a story concerning the family who recently won Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. The Johnsons live in the Third Ward, and their house had been severely damaged by Hurricane Ike to the point where floorboards were rotting and accumulating holes. The size of the house, too, was a problem -- the Johnson family is made up of five homeschooled girls and their parents, too large a family for a house the size of your average living room. The family was picked partially because of their contributions to the community. The two adults, Elaine and Eric counsel couples and are planning to release their book next year. They're also major supporters of Houston's Green Initiative.
A fellow intern and I drove to the Third Ward to visit their new house and interview them about the process. As soon as we drove under the freeway and into the neighborhood, the change in atmosphere was incredibly clear. The houses started sloping, becoming smaller and smaller-- all chipped paint and chicken wire fences, and then no paint at all and chickens. The streets, too, were in a condition less than pristine. The edges of the road dwindled into roadside trenches. Holes pockmarked the surface. My mother and I drove through the neighborhood, craning our necks to look out the window, trying to find the proper house.
And then, from two blocks away, we saw it. Rising above bungalows in shambles with falling-apart roofs rose a house that looked more like it belonged in the McMansion section of Bellaire than among the other places. All stucco and wood and elegant wrought-iron fencing, it stuck out like a sore thumb when in front of the house across the street, a woman in threadbare clothes was shooing chickens into the dirt-and-dry-grass yard.
The interview went well -- the family proudly showed us their elegant home, documenting the entire thing on videocameras they'd just received and then playing us music on a brand new shiny red grand piano. There's no question they were a deserving family. Elaine and Eric Johnson were ready to volunteer information about everything they were doing for the community, sharing enthusiastically their family motto "live right, love all, give back." The five girls were all incredibly poised and sweet, answering questions with a "Yes ma'am" and complete, carefully articulated sentences. "We want to turn this into an Extreme Community Makeover," Elaine Johnson told us. As an article by Lisa Carey regarding the family and Home Makeover episode stated, here was Extreme Makeover helping out "another deserving, community minded family."
At the same time, though, it was hard to see. Who are we -- who is anyone-- to choose who's deserving and who's not? With run-down houses and rusty mechanical remains in lots next door, why does this family get a vast, imposing house when, for the same money, multiple smaller but equally functional and sturdy houses could be built? The family proudly said that their neighbors were happy for them and came to celebrate in their new abode, but it must have hurt at least a little to compare. Of course I'm happy for this family -- there's no doubt about that. They shouldn't have to live with a crumbling house. Then again, should anyone? Extreme Makeover crosses the country making examples of proud, large, photogenic, admittedly deserving and compassionate families and carefully avoiding camera shots of the houses next door.
I was pleased to meet the Johnsons and very happy for them that they finally would have such a wonderful place to live. They're an asset to our community, for sure.
But should this really be the reward for being "community-minded"...
When this is next door?
Sara
A fellow intern and I drove to the Third Ward to visit their new house and interview them about the process. As soon as we drove under the freeway and into the neighborhood, the change in atmosphere was incredibly clear. The houses started sloping, becoming smaller and smaller-- all chipped paint and chicken wire fences, and then no paint at all and chickens. The streets, too, were in a condition less than pristine. The edges of the road dwindled into roadside trenches. Holes pockmarked the surface. My mother and I drove through the neighborhood, craning our necks to look out the window, trying to find the proper house.
And then, from two blocks away, we saw it. Rising above bungalows in shambles with falling-apart roofs rose a house that looked more like it belonged in the McMansion section of Bellaire than among the other places. All stucco and wood and elegant wrought-iron fencing, it stuck out like a sore thumb when in front of the house across the street, a woman in threadbare clothes was shooing chickens into the dirt-and-dry-grass yard.
The interview went well -- the family proudly showed us their elegant home, documenting the entire thing on videocameras they'd just received and then playing us music on a brand new shiny red grand piano. There's no question they were a deserving family. Elaine and Eric Johnson were ready to volunteer information about everything they were doing for the community, sharing enthusiastically their family motto "live right, love all, give back." The five girls were all incredibly poised and sweet, answering questions with a "Yes ma'am" and complete, carefully articulated sentences. "We want to turn this into an Extreme Community Makeover," Elaine Johnson told us. As an article by Lisa Carey regarding the family and Home Makeover episode stated, here was Extreme Makeover helping out "another deserving, community minded family."
At the same time, though, it was hard to see. Who are we -- who is anyone-- to choose who's deserving and who's not? With run-down houses and rusty mechanical remains in lots next door, why does this family get a vast, imposing house when, for the same money, multiple smaller but equally functional and sturdy houses could be built? The family proudly said that their neighbors were happy for them and came to celebrate in their new abode, but it must have hurt at least a little to compare. Of course I'm happy for this family -- there's no doubt about that. They shouldn't have to live with a crumbling house. Then again, should anyone? Extreme Makeover crosses the country making examples of proud, large, photogenic, admittedly deserving and compassionate families and carefully avoiding camera shots of the houses next door.
I was pleased to meet the Johnsons and very happy for them that they finally would have such a wonderful place to live. They're an asset to our community, for sure.
But should this really be the reward for being "community-minded"...
When this is next door?
Sara
Friday, October 29, 2010
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Picture of The Day
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Picture of The Day
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)